Here we are again–back at the Colorado State University. There was a point in time when I never thought I would have another first day of school here, when I never thought I would be a mile high for anything other than to visit, when I never thought I would walk this campus again as a Ram.
But here we are. So it goes as they say.
I’m someone who forgives others way too easily and way too much. I can give you a thousand chances before I learn a thing or two, and it actually worked out for me this time.
After my first semester of my first year, transferring was a big option for my future. I applied and looked toward other schools, researched scholarships, programs, and rankings, as well as contacted some advisors. It didn’t help that I kept this from everyone and was planning on suggesting the change at the start of summer. But even I couldn’t last that long with such a big secret. April was my breaking point on being honest with my family and making those life-altering decisions. But I gave CSU another chance.
I am able to look back on that second semester, on everything it was, and say that I made it. That I’m okay. That I’m happy now. And I have never felt such a sense of pride and growth, of comfort and confidence, of ease and lack of doubt. I don’t worry anymore. I don’t feel like I did anymore. I don’t forget though, I can’t. Because I learned so much in that first year–about college, about people, about myself. About how I want to live my life and what I want to get out of it.
I am so thankful. I thank my lucky stars every single day for what has happened to me. For what hasn’t happened to me. For what will happen to me. I am so blessed. I am beyond grateful for everything happening exactly as it did to bring me to where I am today. I wake up every day with a huge smile on my face, with a plan, with a goal, and with the peace of mind I never had last year.
I know what college really is now. I know what it is supposed to be like. I know what its all cracked up to be. And I’m cherishing every moment of it. I’m not going to say I deserve this happiness, because it can be taken away just as easily as it was gained, but I can appreciate it that much more from what happened in my past year. It isn’t enough to even do that, but knowing how precious it all is has given me this new love for life. Its quite amazing. And so is this adventure I am beginning. Lets see where it takes me. Lets let it go and just be. Be here where we are.